Supporting wellbeing and resilience at home
Positive parental support can offer strong protection against bullying’s negative impacts and reduce the likelihood of being bullied again.1 Emotional, physical and social wellbeing can also help shield against bullying’s negative effects, and protect children and young people from being targeted again.2
Families can help strengthen these factors by:
- building strong family connections through quality time, open communication and emotional support
- encouraging positive relationships with friends through supporting social actives; this might include helping them to find clubs, groups or activities they enjoy
- supporting them to learn and practise wellbeing skills like mindfulness and relaxation techniques to help with stress management, emotional regulation and resilience
- encouraging them to keep doing things they love and are good at to help build self-esteem and give them an emotional break from the bullying
- supporting healthy habits like regular exercise, good sleep habits and balanced nutrition for physical wellbeing
- helping to build confidence and self-esteem by helping them recognise their talents and strengths and reminding them that the bullying does not define them.
Resilience helps to deal with tough times. It doesn’t make us invincible and it’s not the same as just looking for the positive in a situation. It’s about developing the skills and strengths needed to deal with difficult situations through mental, emotional and behavioural strategies, which include seeking support as needed.
Resilience helps children and young people develop skills needed to deal with difficult situations.
Positive coping strategies
Children and young people with positive coping strategies are less likely to experience prolonged bullying and are better able to recover from bullying.3 Positive coping strategies can also support wellbeing and increase the likelihood of asking for help.
- Encourage your child or young person to speak to themselves kindly.
- Remind them they are doing the best they can and that it’s the situation that’s the problem.
- Encourage them to treat themselves with the same warmth, care and understanding they show to those they care about.
- Remind your child or young person that they are not responsible for the bullying (it is not their fault) and they are doing the best they can in a tough situation.
- Let them know you are there to support them and they are not alone.
- Remind them of the good things they can do and the strengths they have.
- Let them know that the situation won’t be like this forever, and you and the school will keep working together until it is resolved.
- Ensure children and young people know what to do and who to go to if they feel unsafe or need support.
- Make a list or an action plan for them to follow in upsetting situations.
- Seek professional help and support to help deal with the bullying and its impacts. Talking to your GP or the school counsellor is a good place to start.
- Help children and young people connect with Kids Helpline or Headspace for free, confidential phone and online mental health support and counselling.
Help children and young people build and strengthen positive social connections by:
- supporting them to catch up with friends outside school
- socialising with other family or friends with children of a similar age
- supporting them to find clubs or activities they might enjoy
- doing something social as a group such as volunteering for a local charity, community group or sports club
- supporting positive friendships in their life to help build resilience, a sense of belonging, self-confidence and self-esteem – all important factors for good mental health and wellbeing.
- Encourage and support children and young people to participate in activities they enjoy away from the bullying. This might be sport, music, walks, movies, reading, exercise, art, activities with friends or family, involvement in clubs or social groups, or games nights. This can help to give them some much-needed emotional space from the bullying.
- Support children and young people to do things that bring feelings of competence and skill to help build self-esteem and confidence. This will help protect against the negative impacts of bullying.
- Work with children and young people to ensure they develop healthy habits around internet use.
- Ensure they know how to use technology features to mute, screenshot, block, delete (and report) bullying to reduce the ongoing stress as much as possible.
- Preventing cyberbullying at home offers more advice on information and communication technology (ICT) use and cyberbullying.
Self-care
Don’t neglect self-care when supporting children or young people. Bullying impacts everyone and it’s important to make sure that you seek support too. This might mean talking to a trusted friend or family member, a counsellor, GP, psychologist or a support service such as Beyond Blue.
- Ersozlu, Z., Wildy, H., Ersozlu, A., Lawrence, D., Karakus, M., Sorgo, A., Usak, M., Kubiatko, M., & Chang, C.Y. (2020). Self-esteem, bullying perpetration/victimization and perceived parental support in a nationally representative sample of Australian students. Revista De Cercetare Si Interventie Sociala, 69, 49–68. doi.org/10.33788/rcis.69.3; Bowes, L., Maughan, B., Ball, H., Shakoor, S., Ouellet-Morin, I., Caspi, A., Moffitt, T.E., & Arseneault, L. (2013). Chronic bullying victimization across school transitions: The role of genetic and environmental influences. Dev Psychopathol., 25(2), 333–46. doi: 10.1017/S0954579412001095
- Sae-Koew, J., Gonsalkorale, K., & Cross, D. (2024). Protecting children and adolescents from cyberbullying: An evidence review of risk and protective factors and effective interventions; Divecha, D., & Brackett, M. (2020). Rethinking school-based bullying prevention through the lens of social and emotional learning: A bioecological perspective. International Journal of Bullying Prevention, 2(2), 93–113. doi.org/10.1007/s42380-019-00019-5; Lester, L., & Mander, D. (2015). The role of social, emotional and mental wellbeing on bullying victimisation and perpetration of secondary school boarders. Journal of Psychologists and Counsellors in Schools, 25(2), 152–169. doi.org/10.1017/jgc.2014.28
- McLoughlin, L.T. (2021). Understanding and measuring coping with cyberbullying in adolescents: Exploratory factor analysis of the brief coping orientation to problems experienced inventory. Current Psychology, 40(9), 4300–4310. doi.org/10.1007/s12144-019-00378-8; Fox, C.L., & Harrison, E.D. (2021). Individual coping strategies and ways of supporting victims. In P.K. Smith & J. O’Higgins Norman (Eds.), The Wiley Blackwell handbook of bullying: A comprehensive and international review of research and intervention (Vol. 2, pp. 222–239). Wiley Blackwell